I miss the sun

I don’t know where the sun went. It was absent for month. Like my father, before he died. No one knew where he was. He had disappeared. Without a word. He packed and just left… Simple as that. A note on the fridge saying: “Bought grocery. You should be okay for a while. I won’t be back. Dad”

But things are never simple, now are they?

He died. Not naturally. He was shot. Stood in the trajectory of a damned bullet, fired from a bankrobber’s shotgun… Straight to the heart. I was told, it was an instant death. Should this make me feel better? It doesn’t. Dead is dead.

It’s a stupid death. That was my first thought. I don’t know why. If he would have stayed…

Mom was… mom. She didn’t take it well. Filling her nights with men and liquor after he’d left. She hardly was at home or showed up to work… She was a drunk before, but now it got much worse.

After a suicide attempt I brought her to a hospital, where she is… Even now. She doesn’t want to talk. Not to me, or anyone else… I couldn’t tell her what happened. The doctors advised me to restrain from news, specially bad news…

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